Dearest Veronica,
The past cannot be changed, forgotten, edited, OR erased… it can only be
accepted.
And my child, you have to do the same. In fact, you ought to
do the same. There was a time back then when I used to be innocent and naïve as
you are now. I was a high school student- studious and serious but then just
one mistake at the age of sixteen ruined me completely. I used to be joyous, fun
loving and dedicated towards everything simultaneously. I was free as a bird
when I entered high school and I wasn't bounded by limitations. It was my life
now and I had complete hold of it. I had that freedom. It was only then when I met
him- your father. We all were at your
aunt’s house and extremely drunk. That was for the first time I sensed
something exhilarating and different between us. Continuously looking at the
stars with our bodies entwined, hands held tight and with country songs being
played in the background. To be honest, I preferred something soothing and
light but in that moment, those sounds and beats were of no use to us. I swear
we were infinite in that very moment! He was tall and slender. He was beautiful,
my love. With his hair falling on his face and that shine in his sea-green
eyes, Oh my! He was no less than a star. It was for the first time that we both
made love under the tintinnabulating stars and tender-tiny rain drops which
merged with my drops- drops of pain. Drops of satisfaction, drops of pain and
drops of ecstasy. The cool sea breeze
struck our stripped off bodies and went back, and then again did the same. Once
we were through, we got dressed and sat with his arm caressing my back and my
head resting on his shoulder. That was
one of a night, a night to be remembered forever.
Sing, sweet nightingale. Sing me a song of night never
ending!
It was days later when I became acquainted with the fact
that changed my life. Entirely. I was thrown on the roads as soon as my parents
discovered that I was expecting my first child. I was completely shattered by
their behaviour. My lanky love couldn't digest this fact so he jumped off the
bridge. At that initial moment, I was torn into million pieces, Veronica. My parents
left me, he suicide and I was there- standing at the same bridge with you
within me. I could have killed myself too, but then I didn't want to be a
killer of that child- with his blood running in him/her. I decided to live. Live-not
for me, not for the society but just for our last loving moments. To be
precise, for you my child. I started living at your aunt’s place and earned by
painting. That painting you see hanging above the cabinet, signifies that last
night with your father. I started working with an advertising firm which helped
me to buy of house of my own. I used to
miss everyone at times but he, he remained in my heart for ever. I never wanted
him to end up things like this.
I never pictured it ending this way. But then again, I never
spent a day without loving him like I used to.
Perhaps, when I woke up that noon dressed in pink hospital
clothes, a wide smile appeared as I glanced you. I've had given birth to the prettiest
soul ever. Yes Veronica- you! Slowly you started uttering and walking and it
was then when I started worrying about past. I gave you the best of all I could.
I loved you and cared for as I had to play your father’s role too.And now when you’re finally sixteen, I stand proudly for you
are like your father- beautiful, green-eyed and sylphlike. I committed mistake
at the same age as yours which gave me the purest happiness as well as took my
happiness away. I want you to be safe, sound and vigilant my love. Do what you want
to, but just don’t act like a nincompoop. Your father must have been proud today
seeing you achieve success. Forgive me for all my mistakes, if possible, I've
always wished for your happiness. Nothing more. Nothing less. It’s your life
now. Your freedom. I've told you the story. The untold story.
Everyone has a dark side and a bright side, my past is the
darker side and you are the brighter side..
Happy Sixteenth Veronica.
The story has been revealed.
The untold story is no longer unsung.
Love,
Your Mother.